Sometimes I feel as though I'm fighting a heavy dose of anesthesia pulling me deeper and deeper into an abyss of fatigue, disengagement, and disconnection from myself and others. The drug is powerful and often difficult to fight. Usually it's easier to just let go; to become a zombie walking around half asleep. I can tell you that this is the absolute worst way to live. There is no passion, no risk, no creativity, no giving of self, no growth, no active interest in life; nothing that makes you feel alive. Certainly Satan gently lures you into this state. Before you know it your life has become a drugery of to do lists, managing risk, maintaining control, fighting fear, and ensuring that you've had proper sleep and nutrition. I've yet to find the perfect antidote for me. Of course my natural approach is to do more of what has gotten me into this state - make a list of things to check off to be more alive. I suppose at some point you must break the routines; speak truth to the lies; push through the perfectionism and performance mentality; abandon the oughts, shoulds, and expectations; trust God and who He says you are; and risk living a new way.
"People are either driven to action or complacency, mission or rust. You're either participating in the Game of Life or you're watching it from the grandstands. Here in lies a crucial difference. A champion plays the game: a spectator observes, criticizes and never really gets to live. A champion knows what he or she wants and goes after it with carefully calculated goals and no-holds-barred action. A spectator feels that his or her life is not their own. They let others dictate their destiny. They become victims of life instead of masters of it." -Bruce Jenner
